Friday, September 9, 2011

take care now.

Recently I've been letting some things take control of my emotions. There must be some rough spots ahead in my future that God wants me to prepare for - that's the only reason I can come up with for these things to happen.

Let me preface by saying how happy I am right now. I have everything I've ever wanted: an education immersed in music, amazing friends who for the first time ever can relate to me, and the love of my life.

Having said that,  I feel like I'm not allowed to be happy now that my whole family's going through all different kinds of strife and sadness. How can I feel okay while everyone else is struggling? Furthermore, how can I accept the fact that there's nothing I can do about their problems? I always thought I could fix it all - I could fix our unhappiness. But I was wrong; the only person I can make a difference in is myself. All I can do for my family now is love them and pray for them, and hope that someday they'll accept me back into their lives.

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